| A Chinese Canadian Mother's Day |
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By Dan Seto Vancouver, British Columbia People often give flowers to their mothers. Fresh, beautiful flowers that almost any mother would appreciate... especially on Mother's Day. Growing up, I wasn't so sure if my mom would appreciate fresh flowers. We certainly didn't have any in our house. We had ceramic vases and containers that were filled with flowers. They looked beautiful enough from afar. But on closer inspection, they were all made of plastic. In my early school years, I didn't have to consider giving my mother flowers for Mother's Day. Just like the other kids, I made Mother's Day cards out of corrugated paper to give to her. I wrote little messages inside the cards in English - which my mother probably didn't understand since her first language is Hoiping Cantonese. Other Mother's Day, the gifts I made for her in elementary school included a clothes hanger, covered with foam and flower shapes. Other years, it would be decorated containers, paper weights and other knicknacks. My mom always said I didn't have to give her any gifts, but she was always happy when she received any gift I gave her. Finally, as I graduated into junior high, I no longer made gifts at school for Mother's Day. That's when I thought about buying flowers for my mom on Mother's Day. I wasn't sure how my mom would react to receiving fresh flowers. My mom had grown up poor in a rural village in China. She often talked about the poverty while growing up in China. She even mentioned she ate boiled leaves for dinner on occasions. Since my mom has always been a practical person, I thought she might think I was wasting money by buying her fresh flowers. They would only last a day or two and that would be the end of the flowers. I decided to buy my mom some plastic flowers instead. I remember the flowers I bought looked almost like a corsage, with its own plastic leaves, contained in a little cardboard box. After I bought them, I wasn't sure if my mom would appreciate plastic flowers. When Mother's Day came that year, I couldn't decide when to give her the plastic flowers. In the morning when I greeted her, I didn't mention anything about Mother's Day and didn't give her the plastic flowers. When we had lunch, I didn't give my mom the plastic flowers. After lunch, Mom took my two youngest brothers for a walk. When they came home in the afternoon, my mom was infuriated. My two youngest brothers treated Mom for ice cream. She was ranting about how I forgot about Mother's Day. I didn't say anything. I didn't mention anything about the plastic flowers. To this day she doesn't know anything about the plastic flowers. One day, I'm going to ask my mom how she would have felt if I was to give her plastic flowers on Mother's Day. Background InformationI was involved in the first ever family history writing workshop sponsored by the Chinese Canadian Historical Society of B. C. in 2006. From this workshop, I began to write down some of the short stories that have shaped my life. I offer the unique perspective of growing up Asian Canadian in a small prairie town. I was born in High River, Alberta and moved to Vancouver, B.C. as a teenager. Mother and father are from southern China. Native language: Cantonese: Hoiping dialect. I graduated from Simon Fraser University, majoring in Business Administration. I am a member of the Chinese Canadian Historical Society of B. C. I am involved in promoting Chinese history through lectures, TV. appearances and interviews. My hobbies include ice hockey, dragon boat competition, public speaking and short story writing. I am currently working on a documentary about my grandfather, a Chinese head tax immigrant who came to Canada in 1910. |
